A Thousand Times Fairer

I love this time of year. Ghouls and ghosties and slutty princesses, oh my! And even better than that? All the candy. Yummy.

I wanna try fucking roller derby. It's totally badass. So is Whip It, in case you were wondering.

My roommate is basically bribing me to get the place to herself for the night. So now I have to go out and find someone to take me home and love me up real good. I'm on the hunt for a bar buddy.

( Marcus )

( Marcus )

( Steven )

Mmmmmm.  Elvis Presley naked in a shower?  Yes please.  God bless Elvis nights on TCM.

Just spotted: Jimmy from Degrassi rapping with Lil' Wayne.

Wheelchair Jimmy.  Lil' Wayne.  Does not compute.

And according to my roommate, this isn't news!  Still I have to say . . . WHAT THE FUCK?!

I have "yeah, baby, ride that dick" playing on a loop in my head because once you hear something, you can't unhear it and my roommate always picks the noisiest fuckers to bring back home.

As reparations, I've stolen all of her Skittles and am halfway through her Cherry Garcia. She still owes me big, though. I am very traumatized.

I have a confession to make.

I hate Lost. I hope it dies in a fire.

. . . says the girl who is impatiently waiting for her roommate to get home so she can watch American Idol.

Why didn't anyone tell me puppies are vicious, unstoppable eating machines?!  Dhalia wants to chew on everything but her toys and bones.  Currently I'm missing a pair of socks, a bra strap, and my favorite pen.  I have a feeling they are just another of this week'smany casualties.  And now she's about to chomp down on my cellphone.  She's the cutest fucking landshark ever, damn her adorable little face.

Youtube definitely just Rickrolled me.

Touche, youtube.  Touche.